The beauty and the dread. Sometimes it's heavenly, having to relate to people, being blessed by the closeness and love that being with human beings brings. It's just that maintenance gets so hard sometimes. Expectation, desire, misunderstanding, pride; such sometimes insidious patterns creep in whether from within or without- and the heavenly bliss of earthly relationship is rudely shattered by words like, "I have a problem, why do you always..." Or the like. Claiming ignorance of the "massive issue" is never quite the right response in these times. Ah, it can get so complicated.
There's health in this confusion, I guess. Rubbing against the rough may not be comfortable but it sure does great things to a piece of iron. Being tired of itchy relationships, I guess I tend to forget that that very situation, though painful to experience, makes me (if suitably self aware) able to learn, to grow, to live more effectively (ironically, the very characteristics that make me human). There you have it, I have one more thing to learn. Or more accurately, I have a thing to learn with every difficult relationsip that comes my way. I guess I could think about it like being shown a mirror once in a while, even if is a cracked up old thing, and instead of complaining about the lacklustre piece(s) of glass, I use the opportunity to comb my hair. Or shave. Or wax my legs, the point has been made.
There you have it - my first official blog. You'd think I should have tried harder. I'd think so too. Yet for what it's worth whoopie, I'mma done blogged my heart out.
